BLARG

so here it is.. possibly my last post for a while...
no, no.. don't cry for me, my lovely minions... stay strong.. go about your lives...
i leave tomorrow... blah... it's going to be HELL... i can't wait!
luckily, i have my jennifer garner pics, and pics of what all the season box sets look like, AND a pic of my sony.. that should help me find my zen centre... (deep breathe)
i'm all packed.. sada is being awesome and giving me a ride to the 'port...
i've just called to confirm my flight... the lady was super nice on the phone... i've never flown alitalia... wish me luck...
so ya.. if like... may comes round, and ya'll haven't heard from me... i've died on a bus/cafe/just walking down the street/taken my own life b/c i couldn't take it anymore...
for my funeral, please make sure ALL my movie/cds go in, and buy me alias and throw it in there too!
i wanna be buried w/ my mac sweetshirt... (the maroon one)and black everything else...
know that i love you all.. you've been great inspirations in my journey, i will love you all forever, and possibly come back to haunt you... (ooo that could be fun! sada, i'm looking at you!)
oh, and put a couple bottles of pop in there too..
well, signing off...
the alias hopeful...
random quote: who do you work for?! get a pen/paper. ok, you ready? yes. e m e t i b. got that? yes. now reverse it...

me for me...(kristene k. stuart)

i've hidden myself within my being
a dramatic production is what you're seeing
i'm afraid i will lose you if i show my true ways
my lies are a labyrinth, a undending maze
i am tired of the play, the acting and all
i've lost my true self behind a fake wall
my actions were false but the emotions were true
i meant every word i ever said to you
i hope for forgiveness and then mabye we'll see
if you're capable of loving me, for me...

(except it's all a lie...)

i am invisible...
no matter how loudly i scream, i remain invisible... a mute to the world.
FREAK.
i am a freak...when i leave the perameters of my bubble, the world sees my flaws...a crowd gathers around me, points and laughs... nags... taunts... teases... and suddenly, i'm not invisible anymore... and i hate being seen... i want to retreat to my sanctuary... my safe domain... my house of dreams...
escape... i'm good at that... i have the means and the power to escape...
no one understands... and that hurts...

holy sleep!

so it's 3:21pm... on this lovely monday (that's a lie, i don't know it's lovely, i haven't looked outside yet...)
just had the LONGEST sleep in history.. i feel like van winkle.. yawn...
here are some updates: thursday i was in burlington at movie gathering w/ the craziest of the crazies.. it was hysterical... monica, you scream good.. wink wink...
then a couple days ago.... the most miraculous thing happened... (more wonderous than jesus turning water to wine...) backstory: when i was in germany, i was watching their version of mtv, and checked out this tune...(well, the last couple seconds of it) and i thought to myself.. wow.. groovy tune... i wonder who it's by? but alas... they didn't say... so.. for over a decade.. i've been hoping to somehow find that song... i have a line stuck in my head...but i can't seem to translate what's in my brain... sad... very sad.... so the other day... i'm flipping through much music.. and BAM! there it was! my song! my long lost tune! wow... i can die right now and be at peace!
it's called leaves by the gathering.... sigh... i'm a very happy bunny running through the woods...
on some random note, i'm still MADLY inlove w/ jen garner... she's the BEST! i can't wait to get alias... and watch over and over... and over.. and over!!!!
today, i venture out to buy some diet coke....
and the countdown to hellmonth keeps nearing 1... (shudder) it's going to be... AWFUL... however, i'm keeping good thoughts for all the money i'll make.. and the sony that i'll buy and the jennifer garner i'll oggle...
sigh...
random quote: ima. ima what? ima gonna kick your ass!
ps. i can't seem to upload any images... :(

sigh....(this is why i'm ALWAYS broke..)

broke but happy...
i bought 6 movies this month :D i'm a very happy bunny running through the woods!
i saw the hills have eyes today... man... BRU-TAL! completely unrelenting.. uncompromising... gruesome... excellent horror... kind of a shout out to the gory 70's... i was super happy that wes craven was the exec. prod. made me happy :D (b/c he did the original in '77)
k, movies i bought:
1. miss congeniality
2. memento
3. elektra
4. war of the worlds (remake)
5. red eye
6. nevermind....

so ya... busy week ahead... i'm leaving the house (for movie watching purposes) and i'll have to stay overnight... this is causing the little hermit quite the panic attacks...(not to mention that i haven't been sleeping all week.. sigh)
well, i'm off to watch more movies...
random quote: there's more than one?!

basket of very manly muffins!

so i've hated mark ruffalo for the longest time.. i don't know what it was... but the guy just bugged the fuck out me... but then i saw just like heaven... and my goodness.. he's the cutest thing...(well, he's the title)... and i recently re-saw 13 going on 30 (shut it!) and ya.. i think i'm officially a fan... he's adorable... and he's got the nicest adam's apple... sigh...
i heart mark...
peace out!
random quote: i'm going crazy a little every day and now everything i've wanted is now driving me away...

the hard decision that came...

i've decided to stop..
i'm trying...
believe me...
(ps. this has NOTHING to do w/ diet coke..)
peace out
random quote: i dunno, i'll have to ask her..

phase one complete

yup, that's right.. phase one is done!
woot woot!
i would just like to take this opportunity to give myself a HUGE round of applause!
i rule, i showed GREAT restraint... and self control!
yay me!
i'm am that much closer to reaching my goal!
that's all i'll say for now...
keep it real kids!
signed
the social hermit
random quote: my heart's still bleedin' timmy miller!

am in mourning... it's a sad sad day for little indigo...

yup that's right.... it's happened... my light has been turned off... the glow that i once had... has dimmed... i'm a sad little bunny walking through the forrest...
my wonderful friends agreed to ebay for me... and i was all set to get ALIAS... all 4 seasons for a few bucks... but alas... how fickle be the ebay machine... how naive i have been... long story short.. i'm not getting my alias.. no sydney for indigo... (sigh...tear...weep)
however, i have signed in/registered myself... and will set up an account and see how that goes...b/c i'm at my computer at all times, i can perhaps find a decent deal... tomorrow i venture out to see if i can find a cheap copy at zellers... (if i can get the first 2 seasons i'll be very pleased...)
in the meantime, i have my pics of jen to oggle... and the many (and i do mean MANY) videos of her that are available to me via the wonderful internet... who knew it would be good for smthing other than porn?!
sigh...